Do you Want to Get Well?

Check out what I was reading in my bible study recently:

John 5:2-3, 5-9 CSB [2] By the Sheep Gate in Jerusalem there is a pool, called Bethesda in Aramaic, which has five colonnades. [3] Within these lay a large number of the disabled – blind, lame, and paralyzed. [5] One man was there who had been disabled for thirty-eight years. [6] When Jesus saw him lying there and realized he had already been there a long time, he said to him, “Do you want to get well?” [7] “Sir,” the disabled man answered, “I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I’m coming, someone goes down ahead of me.” [8] “Get up,” Jesus told him, “pick up your mat and walk.” [9] Instantly the man got well, picked up his mat, and started to walk.

Jesus asks the man if he wants to get well. On the surface, such an odd question. He’s been paralyzed for 38 years, of course he wants to get well right?

So why does Jesus ask it? Because he knows this man’s heart, and we get a glimpse into it in his response to Jesus. He says he has no one to help him. I can’t get well, I’m doing it all on my own. Oof, that hits hard when I think about myself. How often am I stuck in sin or suffering because I am trying to do it on my own, even though I have access to the greatest power living inside of me.

Instead of answering Jesus with “yes I do, will you help me to the pool?” the man provides an excuse and complaint. How often do we do the same? For me, I have always had a hard relationship with food, fitness, and body image. I’ve done pretty much every diet known to man and did GLP-1s before they were cool. My weight has long been an insecurity and my health has been at lows because of it. But the question of “do I want to get well” hits hard for two reasons. Part of me screams yes, don’t you see I’m trying. But my trying looks a lot like my own effort of crash diets and being in control for two weeks before burning out. Part of me screams yes, but I still want to use food as an emotional crutch and source of comfort on those hard days.

Do I want to get well? Yes, but I don’t want to surrender control. And that’s the real rub. Getting well means letting God do the work in us.

Now the amazing thing about this story is that Jesus doesn’t require an answer of yes to help this man. Jesus responds with the healing the man was too broken and beat down to even ask for. This is good news for my recovering perfectionist heart that struggles to even realize my need, much less humble myself to ask for it. And therein lies the beautiful healing reality of God’s grace. It is offered even when we don’t ask for it. So even when I struggle to answer the question of if I want to get well, Jesus provides healing and says, “now get up and walk”.

So the question becomes, what is ailing you? What do you need to get well from? For me, I am working on making sure that only God is my master, not food or a diet, because I tend to vacillate between the extremes. Thank God that I don’t have to make myself well, and neither do you. Jesus is waiting to heal you, you just have to say yes. I pray we are able to do that, together.